Shiny New Toy and Realizations

I finally did it.  I finally made myself go get an easel.  I hate spending money on things that I don't have a 100% NEED for, at least expensive things.  I'll bleed my bank account dry on books and tea, but other stuff?  Yeah...  like blood from a stone some days.  Yesterday, though, I made myself suck it up and go get an easel.  I've had this giant sketchbook for months that I don't DO anything with, simply because it's too big to fit on the table or my lap, and I can't draw on the floor.  So if I was ever going to use the paper, I needed an easel.

It's been duly christened in the manner of my people, of course.  With foxen.

Not one of my better ones, but not too shabby considering the last time I worked on large scale was in my high school art class mphffrgle years ago.

This morning I had A Realization.   As I stood in the kitchen and poured myself a nice cup of coffee, a cool autumn-like breeze blew in the window, a hint of the season to come.  Since I was working the Day Job remotely, I didn't need to worry about getting out the door at any particular time, and so had a bit of time before I needed to do anything.  I decided to write some Morning Pages (which I haven't had the time/brain to do in a long time), while I could.  My mind wandered off in that direction for a minute, daydreaming in that half-asleep Way You Do when it's only been minutes since you crawled out of sleep, and when I came back I thought about the dreaming wander.

I realized that my mind has played the same scenario a hundred, thousand times over my life, mornings like these.  The visual details change slightly, but the essence is the same...  I take my morning coffee and breakfast, and I go sit on my porch/in my living room/studio and I write a few Morning Pages to ease myself into the day.  I get dressed.  I check email, and then I Go To Work...in the dreams case, I go to my studio and pull out my beads/sketchbooks/notebook/bath & body supplies and I work.

I always go back to this scenario, and I have for as long as I can remember.  This, then, is what I need to do.

What I also need to do is stop looking at Art As The Thing I Do For Side Money While I Do Something Else Stable, and start looking at it AS the primary.  I keep looking around at other things to do for stable work, while I do some art on the side, until I can get the art going enough to be the "stable" work.  (Or as stable as art ever is, anyway.)  This MUST change, or it will never happen.

Things to work on...